5 Keys to Living Fearlessly
In this week’s article, I wanted to examine our mantra of “Living Fearlessly.” What do we mean by the saying “Living Fearlessly”. What does living fearlessly look like and how do we construct a life that enables us to live a fearlessly? I wanted to share 5 (humility, discipline, interested/informed, refuse victimhood, own the day) keys that are characteristics of a life lived fearlessly.
I refer to these characteristics as keys, because of the opening and revealing aspect of these traits. These 5 are traits/keys that can be learned. When learned and engaged with, they will open new (or previously forgotten) doors to a more successful and prosperous life. These are only 5 of the many keys that will unlock a new world of understanding and enlightenment for us.
1-HUMILITY; learn to say “I am sorry”, and mean it.
To say “I am sorry” and mean it, you have to empathize with the individual you are apologizing to . It is your ego (most likely the reason you are having to say I am sorry in the first place) that does not like being wrong. The Swiss psychologist Carl Jung, first proposed that humbling ones ego, was the first step in integrating the unconscious or shadow self with your true self.
Admit “I don’t know”, when and if you don’t. There is no shame in ignorance. The shame is choosing to stay ignorant when you have the means to become more knowledgeable. The worst leaders I have ever known (most of them were senior Army Officers and NCOs) were the ones who thought they knew it all. Worse than that, they felt they had to know it all, or it would show weakness to their men and women. Remember, that to seek knowledge is always a sign of strength.
Get a Mentor. This was very important when I was in the Army. I always had a senior NCO or an Officer who took me under their wing to provide guidance, counseling, and mentorship. It is a practice I reciprocated myself many, many times, and I continue it to this day. Find a relative or family friend, a former teacher or professor, a supervisor or a religious elder, all of these are good candidates. Ask sincerely and you will find that those you asked would be thrilled to create a mentor relationship with you.
2-Disciplined; this is a must to live fearlessly.
This is your life’s foundation upon which everything else you will become, will be built on. Without discipline, there is no contentment, no sustained happiness, no progressing health, and no psychological self-actualization, or self-realization.
To improve your discipline level you may want to lay out a day/week/monthly schedule. Some may think this is a very restricting practice, but try it and you will find out it is liberating. I have used a planned schedule for decades, and it is very motivating. A schedule creates a routine and having a routine is the very best way to create momentum, which means you are getting things done in your life.
Fail your way to success. Winning is only an affirmation, it validates the process you are involved in. But, life lessons are ONLY learned through failure. I know, I know, some claim “Failure is not an option”. That may be so, but failure is definitely a possibility, not only that, it is an inevitability. So it behooves you to learn from your failures, so you will not repeat the same mistakes again and again.
3-Informed/Interested; cultivate a lifelong “love of learning.”
Do not trust yourself (too much). It is never good to believe in anything that you can not question. If you are honest and identify something in your life that is totally and absolutely “unquestionable” then you have been tricked into man-made dogma. There is not a God/Politian/Social Justice Warrior worth their salt if they question you for questioning them.
Test your ideas, examine your thoughts, question your beliefs, and scrutinize your perspectives (at least every once in and while), I think you will find this purifying.
Realize you can learn something, from anyone (and do this without smugness). I have learned something positive from the most negative people of my life. Sometimes learning what not to do is the best lesson.
4-Refuse Victimhood; REFUSE IT, it is destructively contagious.
Of course, you have grievances, you have been wronged, who hasn’t. All of us have been victimized at some time in our lives. You did not choose to be victimized, but you can choose NOT to be a victim. Kill that victim which the “woke/unhinged” want you to be! Refuse victimhood, and embrace your unlimited potential.
Identify, and state your aim, “I want to help Veterans and First Responders through mental health.” = Aim/Target/Mark = “I want…”
Set measurable and obtainable goals. Achieving goals will ensure the successful advancement of your aim, “earn my MSW” or “work with trauma patients.” Goals such as Degrees, Internships, Licenses, or Experiences will need to be attained in order to help those Veterans and First Responders.
Take responsibility for your life, Own it. Responsibility and fault rarely co-exist. It doesn’t matter who is at fault in a situation that you have the ability to improve. Having the ability to fix a social wrong, brings with it the responsibility to do so. Taking on more and more meaningful responsibilities is the true purpose of life. For every “right” we have as sentient beings, there is an inseparable responsibility that comes with it. It is only when humankind accepts their responsibilities, that they create purpose in life.
5- Own the Day; Own the Morning and you will Own the Day.
Get up each day and establish a positive, optimistic expectation for that day. Remind yourself “This day was created for me!”, and then do the thing (or things) that will set you up to have a productive morning. Whatever it is, music, meditation, prayer, positive affirmations, or exercise, do those things that set your mind and psyche right for the day. Gratitude affirmations are a great way to start your day off right. Own your morning and you will Own Your Day, Own the Day and you be Living Fearlessly.
Challenge yourself mentally and physically every day. Learn something, read something, listen to a book on tape, or a podcast (especially one with an opposing viewpoint) daily. Challenge yourself to do something physically strenuous every day (walking, jogging, weight-resistant activities, or sporting games). Studies have shown that it is essential to one’s overall good health, to challenge yourself both mentally and physically as you grow older.
In conclusion, these are not “groundbreaking” truths, they are simply 5 of the many keys that it takes to live a successful, happy, and contented life. Take some time to see if any of these keys could add value to your daily routine, and Own Your Day!
Be well and live fearlessly…
Your Brother in Arms
Vincent